Solitude

Time alone is very important to me, solitude is not a luxury but an essential. I just don’t have a great deal of tolerance for being around other people, regardless of whether I want to be or not. So it stands to reason that today has been a very trying day. I’ve had twelve near continuous hours of social time, I’ve not been by myself for more than ten minutes all day. It’s a price worth paying for getting to see the Captain America triple bill and the all important midnight screening of Civil War. It’s a price I’ll be paying for dearly in the days to come. I’m already paying for it now in fact. Too much social time and having to adjust to being in a strange place at the same time means I can’t sleep. All I need is some time alone, not just from the person with me but from my own thoughts. My goal originally was to write something for my “Fallen Soldier” story before seeing Civil War, it didn’t work out quite so well. I have a lot of notes but so far no actual story. Seeing The Winter Soldier again fixed that. I now know how to start and have a few ideas for later on as well. Problem is I need to write them down now so I can sleep, if I don’t they won’t stop bothering me and I won’t get any sleep anyway.

Although I’m sure I would be having trouble sleeping anyway right now thanks to the end of Civil War, I can’t believe they froze Bucky. Just in case him having his arm torn off by Iron Man wasn’t enough, now he’s back on ice as well. I hope it’s a Han Solo type deal, him being unfrozen in the next film. Up till then the film was perfect, I certainly enjoyed seeing Iron Man getting smashed up and the scene with Antman going giant was just priceless. So many one liners and witty exchanges, too many to remember in fact so I’m glad I’m seeing it again later today. I have a feeling it won’t be the last time I see it either.

The only complaints I have is the fact Daniel Brühl was not in it much, a shame since I liked seeing him playing a different kind of character. Two things I have to mention, it was strange hearing him call Bucky by his actual first name James, weird because of course he played Niki Lauda in Rush, his rival and sort of friend being James Hunt. Second of all Daniel looked different, I can’t put my finger on it but he reminded me of how he looked in Rush a little, before the accident obviously. The other complaint is that there wasn’t enough of Sebastian, I would have liked more scenes delving into his and Captain America’s friendship, hopefully that’s to come in one of the next installments. As for German related trivia, the airport they fought at was in Leipzig, I hope that’s a good omen for later on. I don’t expect Bielefeld to smash Leipzig, holding them to a draw would do. Now I am rambling, it’s not a good mix at all. Popcorn, cookies, a late night and now too many ideas. I can’t wait to get home so I can be by myself again. I was fairly certain I could never live with someone else anyway, I mean actually choosing to because I do live with other people right now, it’s just not by choice. Now I have the proof that even choosing to live with someone may not work, I really do need my own space and a lot of it. This is just one day and night and I’m already going crazy. If it’s loneliness or this then the latter is definitely the better option.

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